TERESITA TANSECO-CRUZ
Powerpoint. Bullet point. Ballpoint. The point of using these popular tools is to get ideas across. One sees them in classrooms, symposiums, and similar gatherings. Nevertheless, they are only “appetizers,” best followed by the “main course” of conversation. Teachers discuss it with students. Leaders communicate through forums at international summits. Without dialogue, the point of exchanging ideas gets lost.
Personal relationships use “bullet points,” too, such as Respect, Empathy, Love. But if there is no reaching out with mind and heart, how can those concepts or feelings come to life? Just imagine. Growing up a Catholic, I had a list of “bullet points” for connecting to God. They were the formidable Ten Commandments, weekly Mass, and assorted structured prayers. However, nobody could convince me to “ talk to God; he’s your best friend.”God, my BFF? Impossible! Why he was the Almighty way up there in the vague clouds with the even vaguer angels, and I was only the lowly sinner way down here in the noisy cafeteria with my giggly friends. Why would God allow me to cozy up to him?! I observed the “ bullet points “ and saw God as a distant entity unrelated to my daily concerns. Yet I felt a disturbing, inner restlessness. It lasted decades. I was stuck in the “appetizers“ of my bullet points.
God watched my restlessness and sent me some “ main course “ masters such as Thomas Merton, St. Ignatius ( plus a few remarkable Jesuits), and Richard Rohr. Through them, I began to calm down and see God in a much more personal way. Finally, l can now “ hang out” with God without feeling intimidated or irreverent. In our ongoing “ conversations” nowadays, I tell him everything. His answers lead me out of my self-absorption to check what my neighbor needs. He diminishes my anxieties, lifts my spirit, leaves my humble heart grateful, joyful, and unburdened. I am free to be where and how he wants me to be.
I have now moved from bullet points to the main point. My intimate relationship with God is the “main course”, that is my life.
Thank you so much for sharing your journey from bullet points to the main point, Baby. What insights to reflect on!
I look forward to the day when I will qualify to attend the bonding sessions as one of the Tanseco Sisters, because I have so much to learn from each of them!
Tito Gene and Tita Choleng raised and gave the world a “bishop”, a card-carrying Jesuit, and three other spiritual guidance counsellors (that I know of); they must have special seats in heaven!
LOL (lots of love)….lolita
The journey of Mrs Cruz reminds me of my own. When we are sruck in our own bullet points, not knowing how to know our God better, God sees how our hearts are longing to know Him. He sends priests, books, groups, etc to open our hearts to Him. Our journey with Him starts.
I couldn’t help smile with your term “hanging out” with God. I guess I “hang out” with him too during times ( a lot of times) I find myself alone at home here in Vancouver.
Our condo suite overlooks a memorial park and nowadays I talk to God a lot about mortality. That memorial park reminds me to live each day the best way I can, whether it’s doing laundry or doing REPRO or simply mothering my kids.
“Hanging out” with Him has given me a good measure of peace.
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