GINA ORDOÑEZ
The year of grieving is over – or is it? I remember …
An unexpected blessing from God when I was 40, a gift of a young lady after I had returned from the U.S. to live in Manila. I didn’t realize then how much meaning and profound caring Jenny would bring into my succeeding years.
I had adopted her as a teen. She became “ My Fair Lady,” growing up into my professional and social groups’ language and culture, always behind the scenes, yet sharing the insights that came from her keen observation. Jenny assumed the practical role of allowing me to do the things I wanted to do by taking care of the things I wasn’t good at. Together we wove an uneven tapestry of a happy family life that enfolded her two sons and a husband overseas.
I remember that many thought Jenny was lucky to have me. They later realized that I was the lucky one. Her concern for others rather than herself made me understand the meaning of faithful service and love. Suspicions of any mal-intentions faded as she stayed independent from my offers of financial assistance. She remained selflessly devoted to me to the very end.
That person who gave my every waking day a reason for living is gone. Those who have been through a long critical illness of a loved one are familiar with the unbearable agony of making hard decisions while helplessly watching our beloved go blind, totally limp, and whatever else their illness brings. It is so traumatic that our only recourse is to ask God, “Why hast Thou forsaken me?” And then comes the inevitable sorrow after the loss that wounds the heart interminably.
This grieving has been a gift from God, teaching me to understand and empathize with those who have walked a similar path and cherish loved ones.
A year has passed, and the emptiness lingers. While Jenny remains my loving shadow, will be part of me always, I will dance to the music, bond with friends over sweet wine, and pray to God that the blue sea and sky continue to sustain me through vigorous waves and gray clouds.
