Out of Our Embrace

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As we celebrate the feast of St. Joseph this month, in the year dedicated to him by Pope Francis, we present stories honoring the human yet divine fatherhood of St. Joseph. As the earthly father of Jesus, Joseph humbly and faithfully showed us how a father’s guiding, protective love for his child should draw from the heavenly Father’s boundless love for His Son and for us.

ERNIE E. MAIPID, JR

2020 was the end of the decade when our 3 children started leaving the nest. Our eldest son went to marry in 2011. He and his wife now have 4 lovely daughters. Another son, our second, married a year and a half after. His marriage is now blessed with a daughter and a son. Five years ago, our daughter, the youngest, married and bore a son. A month from now, she is due to deliver another baby boy. Passages! We now have an empty nest. 

My wife and I are now left to experience our senior years together. Two of our children currently reside overseas with their families. Only our eldest has stayed but also stays in another part of the city. And now, due to covid, he gets to drop by once in a while as he does our groceries and medicines.

A Cenacle sister, a friend for the last 50 years, told us, on attending the wedding of our eldest, that we should rejoice with our children when they get married because that is a sign of our success as parents. ‘You should be happy,’ she said, ‘because, other than you, there are others who so love your children, they are committing their lives to them.’ ‘To raise children to bring love to the world is a parental success, and something, we must thank God for!’ she furthered.

Today, we see our children happy as they have become parents themselves and get warm hugs from their darling children. Indeed, love shared, gets around, and returns, even more, intensified! We see our children’s faces light up as they try to manage their tots’ sweet expressions. Our hearts are even more warmed as we know they fully realize the fullness of trust and responsibility that being called ‘Papa’ & ‘Mama’ brings with it.

Once our children leave the nest and are out of our embrace, we are actually passing them on to a bigger, sturdier, and firmer embrace – that of our Father above. We entrust their journey into marriage, family, and home-building in the world to God. We cover them thus, with prayer! We communicate our prayers, thoughts, counsel, advice, proposals, wisdom, and guidance to our children in writing online. That way, they can re-look, refresh, review, re-evaluate, and re-think our lines and ideas, affecting them with greater appreciation, understanding, and internalization.

On his 39th birthday, we reminded our eldest son of his paternal responsibility. ‘We are at peace, knowing we had shown you the value of family responsibility. That means you, Son! You can share it with your wife, BUT the Responsibility remains to be yours, not hers! That is our Paternal Accountability to the HEAD FATHER – God! We, FATHERS, are responsible and answer for our decisions and actions directly to Him!

Our 37-year old second son, having recently decided to settle his family in a new land, got our encouragement when we nudged him to CREATE … while EXPLORING POSSIBILITIES! ‘Be creative. Explore what can be possible outside the box. Sometimes, we choose to focus on the small, black dot in the middle of the big, blank, white space. Write on the space. Draw on it. Cut it out. Fold it. Create art on it. The possibilities are endless, on what you can think, design, and do.’ ‘Remember, we reminded our boy,  ‘BEYOND BEING FILIPINO, YOU ARE A CITIZEN OF THE WORLD, creating possibilities for mankind!’

Our ‘unica hija’ (first child) had been zealously praying for another baby and was quite anxious that she was growing another year, when she turned 33, early this year. Perfect to opening her Jesus year, we shared our prayer entrusting all to Him, BELIEVING THAT HIS TIME IS PERFECT, never early, never late. And that, ‘HE MAKES ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL, IN HIS TIME!’ Exhorting her, we wrote ‘Persevere in prayer! Hope for it! Expect it! Because you BELIEVE, you know that God will give you the baby in His time!’ In closing our birthday note, we urged her to ‘Jump into her Jesus year, leaving all to Him! Our blast line was, ‘MAKE THINGS HAPPEN IN FAITH!’

Close to two months after her celebration, we sent our daughter and her husband this congratulatory note on Viber:  ‘The news of a baby, forthcoming is true ‘Light in the Night’! Congratulations! God has indeed blessed you both. Once again, He has rewarded the persevering. We never wavered in prayer, but His PERFECT TIME came when your eldest turned 3. Truly, His ways are wondrous!’ 

In a more recent note, we wrote to them:
‘At the end of Covid, a BRAVE NEW WORLD will rise! And it is the generation of your children who will shape it. We all share the RESPONSIBILITY of PREPARING THEM  for it! As God was forming our 7 grandchildren (soon-to-be 8) in your respective wombs, we were daily praying that He seed LOVE deeply in their hearts. Another fruit of the womb will be coming out soon, and it excites us! We are confident that God will use our grandchildren to bring His love into the world!’

When the stretch of our embrace falls short, the Father’s arms reach out, through his Son, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, ‘in protective cover’ of our children!

 

4 COMMENTS

  1. Thank you, Ernie, for raising good children, who then are going to raise good children themselves. The country needs more Filipinos like you and your wife, because the world needs good citizens. I’ve been enjoying your articles in White Butterfly….maraming salamat!
    lolita

  2. I am happy for you Ernie. And for Gigi too. All your kids have now started their own families. I can only imagine the sad-joy feeling of your hearts. Thanks for the share. You are now both on a new journey. May the Lord bless your new path.

  3. Thank you for this inspiring piece, Ernie. As always your words touch a chord with me. It has moved me to share my thoughts on Astrid’s recent marriage:

    “Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her”.– Luke 1:45

    Now that the last of the brood has flown the coop, my work as a mother seems done. With Astrid’s moving out, our nest has become empty like yours and Gigi’s. But she will always need me. She will always need me because a mother’s work is never done. My departed mother showed me that motherhood never ends. She not only mothered me but my children too up til her 80s. When i became a mother myself I knew that she was right. It does not. It only takes on another form and adjusts to the changing seasons. And so it will continue with Astrid and her children.

    Today God has answered our plea. Astrid messaged us to share the good news that she is about 8 weeks pregnant. She thanked God for this blessed gift and us for our prayers.

    And we thank you too, Ernie and Gigi . Tight hugs 🤗

  4. To know that your very own parents are supportive of your dream to pursue your own calling is a huge grace from God! When children finally leave home to pursue marriage or the religious life is no little sacrifice given to our parents! This gets harder for them as they grow older! But the ‘grit’ to let go of their children, the ‘grit of love’ to make their children fight for their dreams is the ultimate reason for letting go. That if we truly love someone, we should brace ourselves for setting them free that they may fulfill the deepest desire of their hearts! Looking back, that was the reason my Tatay and Nanay never ever uttered a word of refusal when I finally broke to them the news of my entry to the religious life! Not a word because they themselves have shown us their children the supreme importance of putting God as the center of their lives and the center of the family! When I joined the religious life, I was just giving back to them what they have so well drilled and instilled on their children hearts – the Lord gives and the Lord takes away, BLESSED BE THE LORD!

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